Post by jimcobb on May 15, 2023 20:34:34 GMT
What seems like an awfully long time ago now, I spent several years working in the security field, dealing with all manner of problems, from theft to belligerent behavior. Eventually, I sidestepped into a related field and became a private detective, a career I pursued for about 15 years before giving it up and becoming a full-time writer.
There were numerous occasions where conversations came very close to becoming confrontations. Want to know what saved my butt most often? It certainly wasn’t an intimidating appearance, nor was it an intellect that rivaled the legendary Sherlock Holmes.
Simply put, it was having a sense of humor. I learned early on that if I could get the other person to crack a smile, it dissolved most of the tension and largely defused the situation. This is a great tool when you’re dealing with interpersonal conflicts, whether you’re directly involved or you’re trying to mediate.
It is important to understand that we’re not talking about launching into an entire stand-up routine. What I’ve found works well most of the time is just a self-deprecating comment or two. It shifts the “blame” to you, even if just temporarily. This takes the heat off the other person. On top of that, it is a relatively risk-free tactic. You’re not insulting anyone other than yourself.
This works even if you’re alone. If you can learn to find humor in bad situations, it can help reduce stress and anxiety. There is tremendous relief in laughter. There is a reason why so many high-stress jobs, from law enforcement to emergency room nurses, thrive on so-called black humor. Those outside the fields might not see their jokes quite as funny. But when you’re dealing with life-or-death situations daily, even multiple times a day, a sense of humor can keep your sanity reasonably intact.
Learn to laugh at yourself and be able to poke fun at your own little foibles. Trust me, lightening up a bit can make life a whole lot easier in the long run, especially in stressful situations.
There were numerous occasions where conversations came very close to becoming confrontations. Want to know what saved my butt most often? It certainly wasn’t an intimidating appearance, nor was it an intellect that rivaled the legendary Sherlock Holmes.
Simply put, it was having a sense of humor. I learned early on that if I could get the other person to crack a smile, it dissolved most of the tension and largely defused the situation. This is a great tool when you’re dealing with interpersonal conflicts, whether you’re directly involved or you’re trying to mediate.
It is important to understand that we’re not talking about launching into an entire stand-up routine. What I’ve found works well most of the time is just a self-deprecating comment or two. It shifts the “blame” to you, even if just temporarily. This takes the heat off the other person. On top of that, it is a relatively risk-free tactic. You’re not insulting anyone other than yourself.
This works even if you’re alone. If you can learn to find humor in bad situations, it can help reduce stress and anxiety. There is tremendous relief in laughter. There is a reason why so many high-stress jobs, from law enforcement to emergency room nurses, thrive on so-called black humor. Those outside the fields might not see their jokes quite as funny. But when you’re dealing with life-or-death situations daily, even multiple times a day, a sense of humor can keep your sanity reasonably intact.
Learn to laugh at yourself and be able to poke fun at your own little foibles. Trust me, lightening up a bit can make life a whole lot easier in the long run, especially in stressful situations.